Well... A diary. Hmm... you know I've never kept one before. It's interesting though. I've read some of the others online and I find it fascinating. They've got so much expression. And I wonder. If I kept a diary would I be as expressive as them? As eloquent? Me dunno. I think I might.

Another thing that I find interesting. As I type, I wonder am I writing for myself or for an audience? Like I'm expecting readers or something. So is this diary real? Isn't it meant to be personal? Coz right now, I feel as if I'm writing to somebody and expecting an answer. I sit and I think. And I think it's too early to say. Experiences feeling to new. Maybe just not used to this form of expression. It's funny, as I was contemplating whether I should try keeping a diary or not all kinds of thought floated through me as to what I would write. As I suspected the majority would disappear. But some thoughts remain. And I'm still wondering if I should wirte them down. For what? It's like I want to... but I question my intentions as to why? Is it genuine? Although, I'm not sure what I mean by that. I guess it goes back to that question again. Why am I writing this? Do I want readers? Do I want feedback? Or do I just need to express myself in a personal, intimate way? But then, why would I not keep that private? As I seem to have decided to keep this diary public. Answers seem to float through my head. It seems obvious though (although I feel reluctant to put it down). I want the best of both. I want the freedom to express myself freely and at the same time I want connection. Is that it? It feels right. But I'm still hesitant to admit it outright.

I'm tired. Me needs sleep. Lots of work tomorrow. Wonder if I'll be keeping up with this diary thingy properly? Kinda want to.. but wondering.

LAST FIVE ENTRIES

A short ramble - Monday, Jul. 18, 2005
Results - Saturday, Jul. 09, 2005
A book understanding - Monday, Mar. 28, 2005
Soreness - Tuesday, Mar. 15, 2005
Test - Friday, Feb. 04, 2005